The Ramblings of an Ornamental American

An update on Raymond's quest of life, liberty, and the pursuit of sandwiches.

Saturday, July 28, 2001

�What Raymond wants� or �Love/hate� For some reason I�m really in love with Christina Aguilera right now. It�s really weird. I know her music is manufactured bubble-gum pop, but her voice is still hot. Initially I liked her because everyone else liked Britney, but now I like her because of her style. She tries a lot of outrageous and ridiculous looks, and I think that�s really cool. She appears as if she doesn�t care how strange she looks. I like people who are different. Hmmmm, a Christina poster would look nice right above my PC. That way she can watch over me as I work. My meanness doesn�t seem to be going away. There was one day I was really mean to someone I really care about. I feel guilty about it now because I truly love this person, but was genuinely irritated at her for no good reason. I was talking to Rannie (click on her name) about it yesterday and she says I can get so mad only because of the love. Initially I thought it was very Korean of her to say that (I think Korean girls are prone to evil and insanity) and I really don�t want to believe it�s true. It does make a certain amount of sense though. The last issue of The Hulk reminded me of the whole situation. There�s a panel where Banner says, �Without our hate, we�d have no potential to love.� It�s hard for me to accept this. I�m probably being na�ve. It�s true that the people we can hurt the most are the ones we love the most. It just bothers me that it has to be that way.